Tag – You’re “It”
We’ve all played the game. “It” chases you trying to tag you so that you become “It”. As you run away from the danger, you head towards that one place where “It” cannot get you. Home Base, Safe Zone, The Place to Maintain Freedom. While there, “It” cannot touch you. You are free and relaxed. Yes, you’ll jump back out into danger after you’ve recovered your breath. But you know you can always come back for that breather.
That’s what our home is… The Safe Zone.
It’s Scary Out There!
Well, the way I see it, it’s a tough world out there. Adults and children alike are bombarded by all types of ungodly experiences. It’s inevitable. You cannot escape it.
The media is the worst. Magazines, posters, billboards, newspapers, videos, television, movies, radio, etc. The media forces the negative aspects of the world down our throats:
- women are objectified as sexual icons and girls are encouraged to look like the “Beautiful People” in order to be loved and accepted
- homosexuality is an acceptable practice and is pushing for not only tolerance, but the world’s seal of approval
- adultery is encouraged and is glorified
- young people have relationships with the opposite sex when they clearly are not ready for a commitment
- the Lord’s name is taken in vain along with a plethora of other profane talk
- “dissing” and sarcasm rules – respect is demanded, not earned
- revenge, violence and gore is hyped up
- husbands and wives disrespect each other and do not honor each other’s God-given roles
- evil is portrayed as good and good is portrayed as evil
- occult practices, divination, witchcraft, satanic themes are more and more prevalent
- a lot of music focuses on who is leaving who, or when is the next fix, drunkenness, sexual freedom, etc.
- insert your portion of the list here
And I’m just scratching the surface! We are only covering the media here.
Then there are the situations where we come into direct contact with the outside world. There is less courtesy and more self serving attitudes than ever before. Integrity and honesty is a lost art. Character is a thing of the past. Communication skills are measured by ability in sarcasm, put-downs and a lack of common courtesy. Rhetoric is dead (sniff!) and logic is outdated. Personal attacks are the rule and the real issue lost in the heat of argument.
The Safe Zone
So, when we leave the world outside, come home and shut the door, we metaphorically wipe our brow and say, “Ahhh… safe!” Time to catch our breath, revel in the peace and know that none of that stuff is in our home. “It” cannot invade our Safe Zone; for us it’s the same feeling you get when you’re playing Tag and you are safe from “It” – he cannot touch you, for the most part.
“It” is anything that sets itself against the knowledge of God: the world, the flesh and the devil.
2 Corinthians 10:4-5 New Century Version We destroy people’s arguments and every proud thing that raises itself against the knowledge of God. We capture every thought and make it give up and obey Christ.
Here, we are not invaded by the outside world and its influences. Television Channels were junked about six years ago, and we’ve not missed a thing. Rented or purchased movies do not contain any profanity, sexual themes or innuendos, excess violence or gore, and they are not broken (meaning good is portrayed as good, and evil is portrayed as evil). Music is wholesome and uplifting. Books focus on building character, integrity, honesty and many other Godly Values. Board games abound and so does close family time. For more on this, go to our Parenting Page which explains it all in a nutshell.
Romans 12:2 NLT Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is.
We believe that what we allow to go into our brain affects our thoughts, actions and immediate reactions. Therefore, we renew our mind with wholesome input starting with the Bible. The results are less anger, more compassion and understanding, more grace and forgiveness, and loads of wholesome fun.
Equipping with Tools
In this Safe Zone, we talk about the outside battle and equip ourselves with the tools and skills needed to meet “It” head on.
Scripture
Scripture study is one of the most important activities that you can do with your children and a fantastic weapon! Without truth, how will they know how to respond to the world, temptation, situations, and decisions?
The more truth that our children know, the better equipped they are to handle what comes their way.
Deuteronomy 6:7-9 Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
When our children go out to battle, they are now equipped with a very important piece of armor. Their only offensive weapon – the Sword of the Spirit, the Word of God.
I cannot tell you how many times I’ve had to use the Word of God in order to encourage and help others, get a point across to my children, pray Scripture over someone, etc. Even my children use them now to address a difficult situation or to help overcome temptation. The list is long on where this weapon can be effectively used!
Prayer
The kids know that the “prayers of a righteous man avails much,” (James 5:16). Prayer produces wonderful results. They have experienced healing, answers, direction, deliverance, and many other blessings through prayer.
When they leave our house, they get prayer. They are prayed for during every situation of their lives. They are taught that a prayer in your heart is an amazing way to live your life.
Our greatest tool, prayer, is always present before we go out there. We pray for opportunities to help those who are lost. We pray for strength to endure. We pray for protection against the enemy’s weapons. We pray for the Lord’s Light to shine through. We pray for comfort and wisdom.
We pray for those we’ve met who are lost and look for ways to include them, if possible and if led by the Holy Spirit.
Discussion
We discuss situations that have occurred and try to identify better ways of dealing with them in a Godly Manner. We identify the successes and congratulate each other in them. When we’ve erred or failed, we talk about it openly with each other and brainstorm ways to make it a victory the next time.
Example
And last, but not least, is our example!
Your kids are watching you. They really don’t care what you say – they follow what you do. Do they hear you glorifying God in every situation, no matter what it is? Do they see you turning to God first for help in time of need or for wisdom? Do they watch you say no to some act that might speak dishonesty? Do they see you walk out of a movie theater when God’s Name has been abused?
You get the picture. I don’t want the wrong idea to get across here. I’m not for a legalistic take on life where rules are my way to get right with God. My goal, and what I want my children to learn, is all about a relationship with My Lord and Savior. I live to please Him – not man, just Him. And I want our actions to glorify Him so that others may come to know Him.
What I’m saying is if you are teaching your children to be honest, then let them see you be honest in all your dealings. If your goal is to not have them exhibit profane language, don’t expose them to the junk – garbage in, garbage out.
Whatever you are trying to teach, model it yourself first. Remember, it’s all just a process.
Philippians 1:6 I am confident of this, that the one who began a good work in you will continue to complete it until the day of Christ Jesus.
Does it Really Work?
Well, I believe experience is the best test. Look at the following situations where “It” reared its ugly head and my kids responded with the tools and skills they had acquired:
Dishonesty
Erin, my thirteen year old daughter, went to fun center with three other friends. Once you finish an activity there, your hand is stamped to stop you from doing that activity again. Their hands did not get stamped when they played Miniature Golf the first time around. Seeing an opportunity for a free game, because their hands weren’t stamped, the other girls wanted to go through again. Here was “It” in full force. Not a blatant sin, but dishonest nonetheless.
Erin refused to go through again and told them it was not the right thing to do. The other girls pressed the point, saying that the attendant didn’t have any idea who had been through and who hadn’t. Finally, one of the girls sheepishly supported Erin and between the two of them, convinced the other two girls not to go through. The attendant, having witnessed all this, looked at Erin and said, “Thanks for being honest. You all can go through again.”
Obedience and Dating
Last year, Jared went to Colorado for Christian Youth Camp. In conversation, he was asked which girl he thought was cute in their group. He responded that he doesn’t look at girls that way. When asked why, he indicated that he doesn’t date (check out why here). They kept pressuring him and trying to convince him his decision was wrong and that natural attraction tendencies should not be ignored.
“It” showed its face by trying to break the commitment that he had made with the Lord at the age of fifteen.
Romans 14:22-25 New Revised Standard Version The faith that you have, have as your own conviction before God. Blessed are those who have no reason to condemn themselves because of what they approve. But those who have doubts are condemned if they eat, because they do not act from faith; for whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.
He tried unsuccessfully to get them to understand his position and responded that he wouldn’t disobey his mother. But they kept arguing with him. “It” had another weapon ready. One of them sneered and asked him if his mother told him to jump off a bridge, would he obey? When would he be old enough to make his own decisions?
Jared was frustrated now. He did obey his mom because that is what the Lord says in Ephesians. He had learned that commandment so well that there was never any question in his mind of disobeying God in this one.
Ephesians 6:1-3 NLT Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first of the Ten Commandments that ends with a promise. And this is the promise: If you honor your father and mother, “you will live a long life, full of blessing.”
(My children live for this promise from the Lord if they will just do this one thing – obey and honor their parents).
Finally, Jared, tired of trying to convince with his own words, just whipped out his weapon.
1 Corinthians 7:32-35 NIV I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs-how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world – how he can please his wife – his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world-how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.
Once he said that, they were quiet. The weapon was effective and closed their mouths. He told them that when the time was right, and the Lord revealed it to him, then he would court the right girl and marry her.
A Note…
These are but a couple of examples of what occurs often with our children. Some people have accused us of shielding our kids from the real world. Yep! We sure are!
The real world has a lot of evil in it and there is no need to embrace it and have it enter our homes, too! There has got to be a place in our lives where we leave it all behind and re-charge our batteries. A respite from the battle.
1 Peter 2:11 NIV Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul.
Just in case you think we live in this pristine home with no issues at all, let me set your mind at ease. Can we completely eliminate sin from our homes? Absolutely not. Even Paul had a hard time reconciling his flesh with his spirit. But we can take great strides in making our homes safe.
This is the way I see it. My kids go out into the world; we all do, in fact. We go out to battle. We battle against our own desires, the world and its enticements, and the temptations from the devil. We don’t go out defenseless. We put on the armor of God. Without it, we are weak.
Ephesians 6:10-18 NLT A final word: Be strong with the Lord’s mighty power. Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies and tricks of the Devil. For we are not fighting against people made of flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realms. Use every piece of God’s armor to resist the enemy in the time of evil, so that after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the sturdy belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News, so that you will be fully prepared. In every battle you will need faith as your shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed at you by Satan. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray at all times and on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all Christians everywhere.
A Final Word
Our kids may be out of the world, but we are not leaving them unprepared for the real world. We are all going out into the real world, but we are not a part of it. I see my children as little beacons in a terrifying storm that is trying to eradicate anything of Godly Value in the world. However, they do NOT go out unprepared. They’re ready to battle!
And they know, that when they are battle-weary, exhausted, bloodied, and in need of refreshing, they just walk back into… The Safe Zone!
